FUNNY BLIND DATE QUOTES

“I was on a blind date once, and it was so awkward that even my imaginary friend left.”

“My blind date showed up wearing a t-shirt that said, ‘I’m with stupid.’ I should’ve taken it as a warning.”

“On our blind date, my date asked if I was a parking ticket because I had ‘Fine’ written all over me. Needless to say, that was the end of the date.”

“I went on a blind date with a magician once. He disappeared right after dinner.”

“My blind date asked me if I believed in love at first sight. I said, ‘Yeah, that’s why I’m here – to see if I do.'”

“During our blind date, my date said he had a ‘99% match rate’ on a dating app. I guess I was the unlucky 1%.”

“My blind date said he loved a good challenge. So, I told him to find a way to make our date interesting. He never showed up.”

“On our blind date, my date said he loved spontaneous adventures. So I stole his wallet and told him, ‘Let’s go on a spontaneous shopping spree!'”

“My blind date ordered the most expensive dish on the menu and then asked if we could split the bill. Talk about a cheap date!”

“I went on a blind date and discovered that we had absolutely nothing in common. We couldn’t even agree on which restaurant to go to!”

“My blind date claimed to be a ‘fun-loving extrovert,’ but all they did was sit in silence the whole night. I guess silence is the new fun!”

“During our blind date, my date asked me if I believed in love at first sight. I said, ‘Not until I see the dessert menu.'”

“My blind date showed up wearing a full-on tuxedo. I asked him if we were going to a fancy event, and he said, ‘No, I just wanted to impress you.’ Talk about overdressed!”

“On our blind date, my date said he loved animals. Turns out, he was actually talking about the 20 cats he had at home.”

“My blind date said he was a big music enthusiast. Then he proceeded to sing the wrong lyrics to every song that played.”

“I went on a blind date, and my date spent the entire time talking about their ex. I guess they were still ‘blind’ to the fact that it was a date, not a therapy session.”

“During our blind date, my date asked me if I believed in ghosts. I said, ‘I don’t know, but judging by this date, I’d say my chances are pretty high.'”

“My blind date invited me over for dinner, and when I arrived, I realized it was a pizza delivery driver who got my order wrong. At least I got free pizza!”

“On our blind date, my date invited me to their ‘favorite place.’ Turned out, it was a cemetery. Talk about a dead-end date!”

“My blind date claimed to have a great sense of humor, but all they did was make puns the whole night. Guess they were ‘blind’ to the fact that puns aren’t always funny.”

“During our blind date, my date said they were a ‘foodie.’ Turns out, they only ate chicken nuggets and ketchup.”

“My blind date asked if I believed in love at first sight. I said, ‘Honestly, I’m more of a love-at-first-bite kind of person.'”

“On our blind date, my date brought a checklist and started grading me on our conversation. Let’s just say I didn’t make the cut.”

“My blind date showed up with a parrot on their shoulder because it was their ‘good luck charm.’ I think the parrot found me more interesting.”

“During our blind date, my date ordered the spiciest dish on the menu and then proceeded to sweat profusely throughout the whole meal. It was quite the spicy date!”

“My blind date said they loved surprises, so I blindfolded them and took them to a car wash. Needless to say, that was the end of the date.”

“On our blind date, my date asked me if I believed in aliens. I said, ‘Yes, they abducted me from a boring blind date and brought me to this one.'”

“My blind date claimed to be an adrenaline junkie, so I took them to a rollercoaster. They spent the entire ride screaming, ‘I want to get off!'”