“It’s just another day in paradise, isn’t it?” – Denise

“Every time you open your mouth, a little bit of ignorance falls out.” – Denise

“I’m not just a pretty face, I’ve got brute strength as well.” – Denise

“You know what they say, ignorance is bliss. And boy, are you blissful.” – Denise

“Why have one brain when you can have two? It’s like having a spare tire!” – Denise

“I may not be book smart, but I’ve got street smarts like nobody’s business.” – Denise

“I take pride in being the most normal person in this family.” – Denise

“I never let the truth get in the way of a good story.” – Denise

“You know what they say, life is short but stupidity lasts forever.” – Denise

“If I were a superhero, my power would be common sense.” – Denise

“I channel my inner Zen by avoiding all shallow conversations.” – Denise

“People like us are proof that miracles can happen.” – Denise

“My mind is like a steel trap, it’s just that the trap is rusty.” – Denise

“I cycle through emotions faster than a washing machine on spin cycle.” – Denise

“Why worry about petty things when there are so many big things to worry about?” – Denise

“I have a sixth sense. It’s called common sense.” – Denise

“I may not know much, but I know how to make people laugh.” – Denise

“I always try to look on the bright side of life. Saves on electricity bills.” – Denise

“I don’t need a crystal ball to know that we’re all doomed.” – Denise

“Positivity is overrated. Realism is where it’s at.” – Denise

“If stupidity were an Olympic sport, we’d have a gold medalist in this family.” – Denise

“I live life on the edge, just like an unbalanced seesaw.” – Denise

“I don’t need a degree to know that common sense is sorely lacking these days.” – Denise

“I’ve got a triple threat: beauty, brains, and a biting sense of humor.” – Denise

“Patience is a virtue I lost a long time ago.” – Denise

“I’ve been blessed with the gift of sarcasm. It’s a burden I carry with pride.” – Denise

“No one can ever accuse us of being boring.” – Denise

“I’ve mastered the art of selective hearing.” – Denise

“I find that laughter is the best form of therapy. Plus, it’s free!” – Denise

“If I had a dollar for every idiot I’ve encountered, I’d be a billionaire.” – Denise